Friday, December 22, 2023

Songs for the Season

A few people are re-writing the classics.

Hellscape Neverland (from Deborah Holloway - I added the bridge and re-worked the final verse)

Sirens wail, are you listening?
Family tears, they are glistening
The ERs are crammed 
The wards are all jammed
This is SARS2 hellscape neverland.

Gone away, are the safe days
Here to stay, are the sick days
To cough and to wheeze
SARS2 in the breeze
This is SARS2 hellscape neverland.

In the winter, we can use filtration:
CR boxes, N95s for all
Crack a window, don't forget vaccination
You can keep people safe and still have a ball.

We have the tools to build a safe place
If we care about the human race
We'd clean air and vax
We'd test and we'd mask
And escape the SARS2 hellscape neverland.

The Twelve days of Covid Christmas from Tern

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
12 drummers drumming (up support for herd immunity by mass infection)
11 pipers piping (infected air into your lungs)
10 lords a leaping (to say that the pandemic is over)
9 ladies dancing (on the graves of covid victims)
8 maids a milking (sympathy for having to wear those bothersome masks)
7 swans a swimming (through rivers filled with wastewater laden with SARS-CoV-2)
6 geese a laying (it on thick about how mild their last bout was)
5 bold lies
4 waning herds
3 wretched wens
2 red lines
And a variant that gave me D&V

And for those of us in Ontario, from Theo Moudakis:


ETA (July 2024) - not seasonal but too good to lose -- Main part and chorus by Guiness Pig, and I added the bridge.  Sung to the tune of Petulia Clark's Downtown:

Lockdown

When you are sick and life is making you sicker
You can always blame 
Lockdown
When you are worried why your mind is all blurry 
Seems the cause, you know,
Lockdown

Just listen to the coughing in the schools and through the city
Linger on the sidewalk, catch your breath, it's such a pity
Some still wear masks
A bad reminder of the sickness in the air
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares

By blaming LOCKDOWN
Planes only crash cause of lockdown
Kids flunking school cause of lockdown
Takes the blame all off of you

Additional chorus options:
People miss work cause of lockdown
Miley can't twerk cause of lockdown
Remote work is bad cause of lockdown
It's not Long Covid, you're just sad from lockdown
Inflation is up cause of lockdown
People bought Stanley Cups cause of lockdown

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